Brooks Keeper League I – Power
Rankings – Week 3
Welcome to the Week 3
Power Rankings. Another great week of
football, how bout them Jags? We have plenty of movement this early in the
rankings, but Chase remains the team to beat.
These rankings will continue to be a work in progress, so feel free to
comment with suggestions or just grief each other after loses.
(N/C = no change in
rankings, ↑# = up in rankings, ↓# = down)
1.
Chase: Taste The gRape (2-0,
N/C) – I always thought Skittles not getting Marshawn Lynch on their marketing
campaign was a big mistake, but as it turns out, they came out with his
own special flavor just this year. Midnight Lime is his favorite. In
celebration, he put up 30 points and 3 TDs on SNF and put Chase’s team firmly
atop the leaderboard. Peyton Manning on
lazy Sunday afternoon will still net you 20 points, and Jimmy Graham just goes
about his business. If Chase is going
to start losing anytime soon, his lack of depth could come into play. Murray and Mendenhall will alternate getting
5 points, and Michael Floyd somehow seems like his best flex play. However, he does have Vick, so if you’re QB
needy, there’s a convicted felon sitting on his bench.
Best
Player (this week): Lynch
Biggest
Disappointment: Boldin
2. Jake: My Name is Conky, Bitch
(2-0, ↑1) – The Ray Rice injury
doesn’t look too good, but this was a solid win none-the-less. Matt Ryan is, at least by fantasy standards,
elite, and DeSean looks more and more like the steal of the draft. It helps to have a defense go up against Geno
Smith in the rain. The good news for
Conks is that James Jones, while benched this week, was fantasy relevant and
saw a ton of targets. Josh Gordon also
comes back this week. The bad news is that Mathews will take the starting RB
spot next week for Rice, and he fumbled at the goal line this week. Very unlike
him.
BP:
DeSean
BD:
Ray
Ray
3. Taylor: Chips “Please, I’ve had too
many carries, no more” McCoy (2-0, ↑3) – Two Fraziers, undefeated at the
top of the rankings? This isn’t what I signed up for. Taylor put up this week’s highest point total
behind Aaron Rodgers and friends drubbing of the Redskins D. When you almost give up 500 yards to a QB,
you’d think you would start to reconsider using Brandon Meriweather as your
starting safety. Can’t
even tackle. Anyways, LeSean looks like he has a
shot at CJ’s yard from scrimmage record, and Mike Wallace showed up this week! Good
for him. For some reason Taylor thought
Dallas Clark still played football and started him this week. Taylor may also want to consider murdering
Arian Foster, as Tate is clearly the better back.
BP:
Rodgers
BD:
Todd
Heap
4. Derrick: AP Just Ok
(1-1, ↓2) – Tough loss against a
tough opponent, Derrick’s team just couldn’t get the TDs to go with the yardage
to get the Comeback of the week. AP had
rough sledding against a good Bears run D, and A.J. Green couldn’t replicate
what he did to the Bears in week 1. Cam
has been pretty average for a guy just promoted to Captain. Cam and Josh Freeman should have a buddy cop
show where neither of them wants to step up and be the bad cop so they just puss
out and go home. Things are looking up
for Derrick’s team as Gronk has a 50/50 chance of coming back, but there isn’t
a hurry to bench anyone on this team. B.
Marsh is consistent, Olsen is getting as many targets as Steve Smith, and even
Green Ellis is getting carries, despite the Gio vultures. Playoff Contender.
BP:
B
Marsh
BD:
AJ Verde
5. Jordan: No One Likes You Cutler, Go
Away (1-1, ↑4)
– 4 spots for a marginal win? Well the rest of you should try not sucking so
bad. While not the highest scoring team,
there is a level of consistency that looks promising considering the lack of
TDs from Forte and CJ. Rookies Bernard,
Hopkins, and Austin all got TDs, and Hopkins and Bernard are expected to get
more looks next week. However, Vernon,
Fitz, and White look like they will have nagging injuries for at least the next
couple weeks. Next week will be a tough
brother against brother matchup against AP All day.
BP:
Mr.
4th Quarter
BD:
VD (worst initials)
6. Kevin: Prince Alf The Unpleasant
(1-1, ↓2) – A bad loss against
Matt, Kevin’s team still doesn’t look bad on paper, which is all fantasy
football is…on paper. David Wilson
earned himself official benching status, but Bernard (lol at black guy’s named
Bernard) is up to his usual vulture ways and Bolillo
Powell just might have what it takes to get some red zone touches in NY. Reggie and DT didn’t show up this week, but
Nelson is a must-start and Dobson just has to learn how to catch a ball. Although, I don’t like that Dobson looks like
a
40 year old Arabic Cornerback coach. Bad week for Kev but there is enough here to
put together a decent FF team.
BP:
Jordy
Nelson
BD:
Willllllllllllson! And Justin Tucker.
Anyone on the Ravens.
7. Nick: RK3
(1-1, N/C) – Nick’s bench scored the same amount of points as his starters, and
that’s not a nod to the bench. I think
you could start 1,248 possible fantasy lineup scenarios in week 2, yet each one
would get you 72 points and a bowl of shit.
It doesn’t help that Reggie Bush is hurt (oh
really?) and Lance Moore will only score if you bench
him. I’d chalk up most of the low point
total to bad luck, as Brady was throwing to retarded children in the rain and
the 49ers just don’t look good in Seattle.
There’s a starting lineup somewhere in here, it’s just too bad Nick
can’t start a kicker in his flex spot too.
BP:
Jamaal
(two in a row!)
BD:
Lance Moore (two in a row!)
8. Matt: I Love Chinese Jewelry
(1-1, ↑3) – If Jen is gonna
start her climb to the top; this is the consistency she’ll need from her team.
Stafford and Calvin combined for 40 points, Spiller got over 100 yards, and
even DeAngelo Williams got more than 20 carries for the first time since
Jonathan Stewart was drafted. Finley
actually looks solid this season, and even Stevie Johnson is making the bench
look good. Somehow Danny Woodhead had a
combined 17 touches and should be someone to watch going ahead. RB depth gets pretty grim after Woodhead
though.
BP:
Calvin
Johnson
9. Anton: Me Likely Matchups Against
Ryan
(1-1, ↑3) – Just because I made
a few jokes about Lamar Miller and he goosed last week, doesn’t mean you sit
him this week! Ok it does, but at least it was welcomed production against a
bad defense, especially because Lacy got a firsthand demonstration of Brandon
Meriweather’s tackling skills. Doug got his yards, Dez got his way, and
Bullock’s got
the yips. This is a
nice jump from the bottom of the standings, but Anton still needs to get his
bench in order. Decker and Lamar are
solid, but after that it’s like 3 defenses and a bunch of #3 RBs.
BP:
Dez
BD:
Randy Bullock
10. Ryan: Wizards of Waverly Place (0-2,
↓5) – Ryan just can’t catch a
break, or any TDs for that matter. When
you go Costco wholesale on Steeler’s WRs in the draft, you could at least start
one instead of Vincent Brown. Brown will
benefit from Malcolm Floyd going down, but he’s averaging less than 7 yards a
catch. Jared Cook fell back down to
earth and Frank Gore at least gets a shitty Colts D next week. Steven Jackson going down is like winter, you
know it’s gonna happen every year, just not this early. I’ll reserve dropping Ryan any lower this week
as RG3 is still the king of garbage time and maybe Selena Gomez will show up to
use some of her “bean”
magic.
BP:
RG3
BD:
Any WR on Ryan’s team
11. Mark: Bust a Red Kaep
(0-2, ↓3) – Mark’s team actually
looks better after the Sproles-Bowe trade (even if just for this week), but
winning is what makes you move up in these rankings. Bad matchups and luck did Mark in this week,
as Kaep sucks on the road in Seattle, and Vincent Jackson had a couple big
plays called back. Romo couldn’t find
Jason Witten against the Chiefs, and Mark Ingram was drafted to get stuffed at
the goal line. I love the Knowshon pick
up, and Seattle’s D looked convincing as always, but you can’t count on those
two to win you every week.
BP:
Knowshon
(lol at spell check and black people names)
BD:
Mark Ingram
12. Mike: What Would Matthew Berry Do?
(0-2, ↓2) – It sucks being the
team that gets the most points against.
It’s not like you can play better defense. However, not sucking and not trading for more
Saints players are other options. The
Saints lost a bunch of o-line in the offseason and they are certainly not going
to run the ball anytime soon. Mike’s
team will live and die with Brees-us’ fantasy production and whether he can get
it to Sproles and Colston in the red zone.
Ridley is also a pretty big disappointment, which is surprising
considering NE’s lack of options at RB and WR.
Thanks to Julio Jones, this team can be fixed, but Mike could maybe
start by getting rid of Steelers D for the sake of the integrity of the league.
BD:
Ridley
Sweet
Gifs of the Week
Weekly
Awards
Player (of the week) – Rodgers (Chips)
Start – Gonna have to go Mike Wallace, he should
start but was an iffy play after last week (Chips); Runner-up: Jay Cuts
Good Sit – MJD (Kaep), Mark Ingram sucks, but I’d
assume he sat MJD for Knowshon.
Runner-up: Tony Romo (EL Romo)
Bad Sit – James Jones (Conky)
Comeback –Everyone Loves Romo over Bust a Kaep
Most Points – Chips
Margin of Victory – Taste the Rainbow
Bounce back Player – Calvin Johnson (CJs)
Week
3 Picks
King
Alfred over Rookies
Rainbow
over
CJs
UPSET:
Kaep over McCoy
Griff
over Klan
Conky
over
Brees
MATCHUP
OF THE WEEK
Romo
over AP
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